We have been fortunate enough to attend quite a few of these life cycle events. What a wonderful opportunity for us!
The first year we were here we were out for a walk one evening and passed by a home where there was a birthday party in the yard. The children were just starting to swing on the piñata. We watched for a few minutes, and were so surprised to be welcomed in. Lea was invited to take a turn and right away, was considered a part of the party! We talked afterwards about how we couldn't imagine that happening at home. It probably wouldn't...
And then there were our small birthday parties that we celebrated at our friend's homes. Similar to our birthday parties, we gathered, had cake, and sang a special birthday song.
Lissett's Bday celebrated at her home. I was struck that the "candles" on the cake were matches that were lit. They burned really quickly so Lissett didn't have much time to make a wish!
Short video celebrating Lissett's Bday.
José grande's father (abuelo) celebrating his bday. We believe he turned 83 but they weren't sure of his exact age.
We celebrated my Dad's 70th Bday in a restaurant downtown when he was here visiting.
I was invited to this woman's bday party with my friends Berta and Miguel.
And here's the band that played for her. No matter what the age, they love to celebrate here!
José grande's Bday at his home.
A short video from José grande's bday party.
Coincidentally, Brian's birthday is on the same day as Aurora (our close friend's) mother so we had a party with the whole extended family!
The abuela's cake and Brian's cake. Brian looks excited to dig into his!
A short video from their bday celebration!
A photo of the whole extended family the night of the party.
And my birthday party that we recently celebrated at our home:
With José grande, Brian, me, José Junior, Lissett, and Aurora.
A short video from my birthday party.
Lea and I outside before going out for a special dinner just the three of us on my actual bday. If you notice the matching necklaces, they were a gift from Brian. When we were in Murano, Italy (glass blowing center of the world) Brian bought these for us in the first, original, Jewish ghetto in Europe.
Generally, when a girl here turns 3 and 15, large parties are held for her. I heard that originally, the reason why a large party was celebrated at three years old (tres años) was because if the child had made it to that age, most likely their survival rate was high. And 15 (quince años) is a rite of passage in terms of becoming a woman. In past years we attended a few of these parties, and this year have really enjoyed being a part of more of these festivities.
It is our close friends who have welcomed us to their family's or friend's parties. The hosts have been so warm and welcoming toward us, even though we've never met! Here, parties last for hours! Generally, they'll start sometime in the afternoon and go through the night. People come and go as the hosts warmly welcome the new arrivals.
This year we attended a tres años birthday party with our friends Berta and Miguel. We truly enjoyed the mariachis, food, company, and dancing!
Here's the bday girl!
And the mariachi band that played for her.
Their parties have some things in common to ours... Balloon clowns are one of them!
Our friends Berta and Miguel at the party.
Kimberly enjoys a dance!
A short video of the mariachi's playing their great music!
We also had the opportunity to go to a couple of quince años parties this year. The first was Lea's teacher's daughter. We were shocked that it was like attending a fancy wedding! There were hundreds of people under a large tent. The girl was in a very elaborate dress. It was a catered event with waiters who served an abundance of food and drink. There was a huge, elaborate cake, and live music kept the party hopping. We were shocked by the amount of money the family must have spent on the event! In most cases, people here don't have much money but they certainly like to host friends and family to acknowledge important events and celebrate being alive and in the moment!
Lea with the bday girl.
And here she is with her father, who happens to also be the director of Lea's school and Lea's teacher's husband.
And the cake!
Lea and Kimberly eating. Sine we don't eat meat, it's usually just the side dishes for us when we're out... That's fine. We still enjoy it!
We went to another quince años with my Dad and stepmom that was equally as elaborate, and this one was for twins!
Here are the twins.
And a doll that looked like them!
Lea with José, Aurora, Lissett, José Junior, and two of the kid's cousins who also live closeby and who we've gotten to know well.
Lea with the kids.
I thought this was a good opportunity to slip in a photo of Lea with the same kids (her close friends) which was taken our first time here, about 4.5 years ago.
Brian and my parents at the party.
In addition to the birthday parties, we were invited to a wedding (also when my Dad and stepmom were visiting) which was quite an experience! We were welcomed into the home of the groom and without realizing it, I think we were in his bedroom when he came in to finish getting dressed!
Us with the groom in his home.
There was a turkey that someone brought over which stir a lot of excitement. A ribbon was tied around it's neck and off the turkey led us in a parade through the street along with a brass band. The groom led the way carrying a box with his soon-to-be bride's wedding gown. A man danced next to him to the sound of the music while carrying the turkey!
The woman who carried the turkey.
A short video of the procession to the bride's house.
My Dad, Ellen, and Lea during the procession.
Friend's of ours (who are relatives of Aurora's) who invited us to the wedding. Yoseline was bringing the head piece to the bride.
The procession led us into the bride's home for the Friday night party before the wedding on Saturday which unfortunately, we were unable to attend. Again, we were welcomed with open arms and had a wonderful time!
Approaching the party after the parade.
A short video of the wedding party.
I managed to capture a kiss!
A great shot of a friendly man at the party.
Here's another wedding party in the street accompanied by a brass band.
A wedding party I saw in the street downtown.
A short video of the wedding party.
In addition, we witnessed a few funeral processions, but this year we were fortunate enough to experience death up close. In Mexico, people embrace death as a part of life. This is evident in everyday life in the marketplace.
Chicken in the market.
Chicken sold every morning around the corner from where we live. The chicken and meat is not refrigerated here. It was most likely killed that morning so refrigeration is not necessary.
And heads in the market. A lamb?
More heads in the market.
People embracing death as a part of life is also evident in the funeral customs here. Our close friend José grande's grandfather had been a part of our lives since we started coming to Tepoztlán 4.5 years ago. The abuelo (he was called buelo) lived with the family so we saw him often. We were fortunate enough to celebrate his birthday with him shortly before he passed away. He's shown in a photo above for his birthday celebration. Buelo's body remained in the home for two days after he passed, which is traditional for a smaller community in Mexico. His open coffin was surrounded by burning candles, white flowers, and burning incense.
This is where the abuelo's casket was. Out of respect, I didn't take a photo when his body was there.
During those two days, many friends and family came to honor him and his life. They brought candles, flowers, and uncooked food, and it was the family who cooked for the guests. You could imagine how exhausted our friends were! In addition to all the cooking, José grande stayed up all night for the two nights next to the abuelo to avoid any evil spirits coming and entering his body.
People came to view the body and recite prayers and sing hymns. There was an actual service held too. Hundreds of people from the village came at different times to show their respect. It was a true honor to be a part of. Clearly, this man touched many lives. The event was a very real, down to earth way of acknowledging his parting.
The service that was held at the family's home.
A meal the family gathered for at the time of the funeral.
A photo of the abuelo that was over his coffin.
Brian is considered close enough to the family that he was one of the men who carried the coffin from their home to the church in our barrio after the two day period had ended. There was a procession to the church with the people singing hymns, carrying white flowers, and burning incense. Once we arrived at the church, there was a short service held there. Then the body was taken away to be cremated which isn't necessarily common, but was his choice.
Here is another funeral coming from the main church. I don't have a photo of Brian carrying the abuelo's casket.
The "hearse" here in the village.
A day or so later, there was another procession from the family's home to the cemetary in the village. There was one person in front who carried the box with his ashes and another who carried the wood cross with his name, dates of birth and death, and a short tribute to his life. This wood cross is temporary and is replaced by a metal cross after one year. Again, there was chanting as we walked slowly with incense burning and white flowers in arms.
A short video of the procession to the cemetary.
Here's the funeral store in the center where people buy coffins and crosses.
The inside of the store.
We were struck by the fact that a policeman on a motorcycle escorted us most of the way, even though the people here believe the police are corrupt and don't actually assist the people. I think in a smaller village like Tepoztlán, this man probably knew at least one person who was close to Jose's father, so he cared about keeping the people in the procession safe by separating the cars from where we walked. When we arrived at the cemetary the box was buried next to Jose's father's remains, who had died a few years before. There was a short service held for family and close friends, and handfuls of dirt were thrown over the box in the ground before the grave was filled.
At the cemetary with candles and flowers.
What I noticed was that it was so REAL. Nothing was hidden. Everything about his death was out in the open. After being a part of the "Dia de los Muertos" celebration here in November and experiencing our close friend's grandfather passing away, I saw up close how much more comfortable the people are here with death. Instead of being afraid of it and avoiding it, they actually embrace death, as I mentioned earlier.
Here is the cemetary on "Dia de los Muertos."
And "Dia de los Muertos" at night in the cemetary. It was a big party with lots of people, food, and music!
A large part of the reason why our time here has been so meaningful is that we've gotten to experience events such as these side by side with our friends. We've gotten an insider's perspective of what life is actually like for them. We have gotten to know the culture and the customs by seeing up close how the people here actually live their daily lives and celebrate/ acknowledge life cycle events such as these. Again, how completely blessed we feel to have had all these opportunities that will be with us for the rest of our lives.
